Started last nite…was very hot yesterday and was really tired after my walking so just hung around the rest of the afternoon and evening. Had some grilled cheese up in my room for a snack at nite. I was up the roof playing “bubbles” and listening to my lovely flute music when Ben came up and asked what I was doing. I said “Some real deep spiritual work”. He came to see what it was and burst out laughing when he saw what I was playing. I explained it really was a form of inner work for me as it was one of the few ways I could find myself completely “mindless”!. And then like a little boy he asked if he could please please please try to play too, but I warned him that it could be dangerous to begin this game.
“You can’t just ‘try’ this game and he replied: “I’m fine…I don’t get addicted to this kind of stuff”.
Well, I could not get him to relinquish the mouse for 1 ½ hours until I finally asked to be allowed to go to sleep. He said OK but please please please could he come up again to play in the morning.
I thought he was joking, but bright and early he was up here and spent another 1 ½ hours in this completely mindless but actually relaxing pursuit. I, in the meantime, realized I didn’t feel like doing anything today. Perhaps the weather-it is actually overcast, windy and chilly…so I sat in my room while he played and cursed, and I did some work I needed to for myself. Finally kicked him out and now am alone and still with no desire to do anything. I am listening to music, will play some games as well, hang around with people at lunch…all here “at home”.
This evening I am hopefully going to do a past-life regression with a guy named Dudi to see if we can find the source of my irrational fears and finish the cleansing process once and for all.
So it will be a quiet, reflective, lovely day doing “nothing” and feeling wonderful about it.
8 PM
It is now almost 8 in the evening. Had the need to sleep this afternoon, (only in retrospect did I realize the entire lack of energy the whole day was due to my anxiety of what I might find out during the healing session….) and when I woke up I did the healing and past-life regression with Dudi and it was wonderful Received more answers and insights into the fear thing and am completely energized as well. And when I came out, it was raining and no electricity! (That would explain the slight twinge in my hip yesterday and this morning). So, got a couple of candles from downstairs and am now up in room, by candlelight, incense burning, eating crackers and cheese and listening to folkdancing and for the first time this trip even have the urge to dance!. Am feeling really good and if the electricity comes back on, I have a “date” to watch the movie Himalaya with Ben this evening and if not, will dance in the dark alone!!. (Or so I imagined!!). And then the strangest thing happened. I have about 600 songs in my folkdancing playlist, and I put them on to play at random, and the first song that came up was a further answer to what went on during the healing session with Dudi. A song with words which said exactly what I still needed to hear was playing, as if the angels , or my guides were singing the answer to me disguised as the voice of Daklon (Israeli singer) singing “Al Nevakesh”. All the verses are insightful, but just as an example, here is a translation of theverse:
“There are unknown secret things which we cannot understand or know
Things may happen which seem without reason
Not all things need to be investigated and questioned
Sometimes it is alright not to know everything”
I imagine the air will also be less heavy tomorrow and I will feel like walking again (And that was exactly what happened, as I woke up the next morning to the clearest bluest sky I have seen since arriving and a lovely feeling of clean and fresh in the air).
And then Ben arrived….no lites…caught me dancing…but just asked to sit down and play again, which he did until the battery ran out on the computer. Then we just sat and talked until my sweet neighbors came up. Finding their room dark and uninviting, I asked them to come in and join us. By then it was raining hard and quite dreary…they came into my candle-lit room, and said “Why does it feel so warm and comfortable in here? Our room is the same but it is nothing like your room” It’s like when people come into my living room at home and say the same thing…good energies…My room is very inviting. We sat and enjoyed each others company, all the time with my folkdancing music still playing and everyone commenting that it was quite pleasant to listen to. Close to 10 the lites finally came on so the girls left and Ben and I still had our movie date! We even sat and held hands like in the real movies. Only thing missing was popcorn. In all, it was a lovely day!
And now it is morning. Brilliant blue sky…lovely sunshine, nice breeze and clean fresh air…like after a chamsin at home when the rains finally come. Beautiful, beautiful day.
I went down to the market with a few friends and actually found fabric I liked and which is now at the tailor to make a couple of more things for me from things I already have and like from home.
Friday, March 14, 2008
# 17 March 13-14 – Lazy, Lazy, Lazy….and Rain
Wednesday, March 12, 2008
#16 – March 10-11, 2008 – Back to the Real World and A Really “Rough” Day
Interesting, during the previous 3 days I had this intense need to be alone, and work on the issue of irrational fears. (A posting will eventually find its way to the Mindfulness Journal, but it is still being contemplated to try and get the full impact of those 3 days across). And to my surprise, I WAS entirely alone. No one came looking for me at my room. Id didn’t meet anyone in town anywhere, nor bump into any new, or old friends at meal times. And today (yesterday actually), which I declared a “vacation” day for myself, and just hung around doing relaxing things –
nothing require any great effort either physically, mentally or spiritually, the people who saw me during the day told me I looked: renewed, vibrant, full of life, at peace, tranquil etc. But still was alone most of the day. [ Except for my meeting with Dudi, which will have to wait for another post].
And when today, (really today), I more or less got back to my “real” world, everyone staring turning up again…pretty much coming out of the woodwork so to speak. Yael, a young Israeli girl, came for advice and we sat for a long time early this morning. Then I went down to mail my package and met a nice Indian guy on the way and we talked for awhile. He is from Kerala and vacationing in Rishikesh and wanted my advice about sending a package “home”! Then, back to my room where I had prepared a small snack of cheese and grapes before headingoff to the Ganga, when Ben turned up. He’s started his teachings with the Swami Dyananda (also Akhilesh’s Swami), and I figured I would not be seeing him for awhile. Well, HE came to tell me about his first evening and morning and so we snacked together and he talked. . Then finally got down to the Ganga, and following my “swim”, walked into Moksha, the nice new restaurant down there and again met Yael, not planned, eating with a young German guy so again had company. There was hardly a minute during the day when I was not with someone else. And just as I thought I’d be heading back to relax, my phone rang (I had it with me for this exact reason, just in case) and it was Nikolai, asking to meet me in about an hour for Chai! So, back to the room, quick shower and down to spend a lovely 3 hours with him, after not seeing him for a year. And WOW! What a story HE had to tell.
From a deeply devoted practicing Buddhist of 7 years, living most of that time in India with short and infrequent trips back home to visit family, living at a monastery and preparing for his first 5 year retreat, he is now going back to Moscow to get married to a very rich girl he knows since age 14 (he is 32), who was married previously, divorced, has a 7 year old son (which he says may even be his anyway), and is very rich. He will go into her father’s business which he says is dirty, cut throat and completely demanding, and wind up getting rich himself!! When I asked how this will effect his practice and all his Buddhists beliefs, and why he was doing it, he replied that if he didn’t do itnow, he would always wonder if he made a mistake and with regrets, could never move forward in his practice anyway. If it works out, he will assume he was never as truly committed as he imagined himself to be, and if not, in 4-5 years he will simply leave it all and come back and continue from where he left off!
It is now the next day…March 11th, and I had planned, after the very intense “people filled” day yesterday, to go early to the market to do some shopping I still have on my list. But Ben joined us (my 2 British neighbors…I know, I haven’t written about them either), for breakfast and then came up to speak to me further about the teachings and why they are not working for him, and how disappointed he is in himself etc. It was an intense, and long talk, but quite insightful for him, and in the end, I didn’t leave for the market until after 12.
I easily found the computer shop recommended to me on Railway Road, and if I hadn’t just seen myself walk into it off the Rishikesh street, I could have sworn I was back in raanana! I bought a Logitech cordless mouse and it was so pleasant shopping there . They didn’t just hand it to me, take my money and say goodbye as would have happened back home. They opened up the substantial packaging, took out the mouse (I hadn’t said a word, was just expecting to pay and go), showed me how to put in the battery, how to store the USB piece, how to get the best results from the mouse, plugged it into their computer and asked me to try it and see if it was comfortable…all this before taking any money for me…)
I then decided to look for a mortar and pestle from marble for myself and one of my daughters, and some fabric to have a couple of favorite tops remade for me by a local tailor. But then remembered that the cosmetician I went to last year was right up the same street so figured I’d walk up just to make an appointment. I wound up spending the next 2 hours being completely pampered including back massage, and all kinds of beauty treatments, which were as wonderful as I remember them being, my face is as smooth as a baby’s behind, and all for 250 rupees!!
I DID find a mortal and pestle, as well as having my late lunch of brown rice and steamed veggies, went up to my room to rest from this really “rough” day…it was 4:30 by then and I have been up since 5:30 this morning. I am liking Rishikesh more and more each day and will definitely be back here.
I have BTW, begun doing my yoga, pranayama and meditation outside each morning facing the rising Eastern Sun and it is quite powerful. Trying to figure out some way to do that at home but so far cannot think of any practical option.
Namaste for today
Jane
Sunday, March 09, 2008
#15 March 8, 2008 – FREEDOM FROM FEAR
Where to begin. There actually is nothing much new happening as far as “travel” goes, and you may all be finding my posts getting boring, but I am in a very personal place right now and what is happening in my life right now is exciting to ME.
So, first of all,
the video promised will have to wait until I get home as it is taking too long to upload it from here…it is a lovely one but I will get it up on the blog as soon as I get home.
The Ganga is rising from day to day. It is quite amazing. In the pictures I sent from just 2 days ago, there is a large square kind of rock sticking out of the water which I held on to so as not to slip. Yesterday it was no longer on the shore and half submerged, and today it was well out into the river and almost completely covered over. There is also a current now and eddies and small rapids forming where there were just calm waters 2 days ago. The snows are melting fast I guess and the water seems to be getting even colder, but I do my dip each day and love it.
I continued working on fears, and picked other lovely cards for the next two days as instructed (!) and I won’t go into details here but I was given further insights, reinforcement and encouragement to continue.
Yesterday I picked the angel Shanti “I am the angel of peace. I bring you new tranquility and a smoother road ahead”.
And the Goddess Hathor reminding me to “allow yourself to receive. This will increase your intuition, energy and ability to give to others”.
And today, the angel Adriana telling me “I am leading you toward the answer to your prayers, Please listen to and follow the steps I am communicating through your intuition, thoughts and dreams”
and The Goddess Ixchel…reminding me that “You are a channel for Divine healing power” and to continue my healing practice and to honour my healing knowledge and abilities and to continue to teach others….
I’ve been out 3 days in a row now for hours in the full sun, with no ill-effects, dipping in ice cold waters with no hip or knee problems, and going out at night, in the dark, alone, and completely enjoying my new found freedom…freedom to do what I want and always thought I couldn’t, and freedom from fear.
I find myself spending more and more time alone, being out of my room from 10 in the morning until 5 or 6 in the evening and then going out afterwards to eat if I feel like it, so even if people look for me, I am not around. I also have less and less need for the computer, and am only writing now to get this down “on paper”, more for me than anything else. It is a very powerful period in my life’s journey right now, bringing many things together in a process which began months ago and all things seem to be now falling into place. I feel very blessed and at peace with the process and confident that many more of my issues with fears will dissolve over the next period of time.
And the best surprise of the day was, I literally bumped into my friend Nikolai on the street! 
I know him from McLeod and only see him there, and he mentioned he was coming to Rishikesh for the first time for a short vacation in one of his e-mails. I was getting ready to write to him today to ask when he was coming, when I literally turned around in a shop and bumped into him! He has been here for a week already and is leaving in just 3 days. He is also staying at Swiss cottage but we have never seen each other. Very funny. Hopefully he will come up this evening as he wants to see pictures of the latest family members and see how the others have grown since last year when I saw him. You might remember he is my Russian born Buddhist friend, around 30 now I think, who lives about 8 months a year in India, sometimes even longer and mostly at Tashi Jong where is lama (teacher) is and where Tenzin Palmo’s nunnery is located.
I’m including his pic from a few years ago…he now sports a really smart mustache and goatee…
Ah…yesterday I finished most of the little shopping I had to do (which you all know I hate) and hope to get a package out sometime this week and know I am finished with that.
And I will end here for today
Namaste
Thursday, March 06, 2008
# 14, March 6, 2008- Massages and Messages or.. Could a Day be More Lovely?
Continuing the Story which began yesterday with my talk with Amir, I received a very clear message last night while asleep…not a dream like message, a spoken message: “Don’t go swimming at the Spa pool, BATHE IN THE GANGA and ask her to remove and wash away your fears!”.
So I awoke this morning
knowing that I would definitely go to bathe in the Ganga today, despite my fears of “where to go”, “what to wear”, “how cold will it be”, etc. But before going down for my massage, decided to just pick a card or two, and wound up pulling one from each of the two decks I have here with me…figuring I might get further reinforcement from the cards which might help me overcome the real fear I was feeling about what I knew I had to do today.
Well, the first card I picked was Archangel Raphael (one of the Archangels I ask to accompany me each day in my morning prayers and meditation), and the card says:
"I am helping you heal physical challenges in yourself and others. You are a healer, like me”.
Quite amazing…a big grin appeared on my face, knowing that I was certainly not alone in this venture and couldn’t have asked for better company.,
And then just for good measure, decided to pick from the other deck, and the card that came up was:
Sekhmet…which reads: “Be Strong”…” You are stronger than you think you are, and your strength assures a happy outcome”.
Even more amazing…
Then I happily headed down for my massage with Bablu and told him about my plan to go immerse myself in the Ganga after the massage and he said “How did you know to do it today?” Didn’t really understand the question but told him I received a message during the night that I must do it today. He said the message was directly from God because today is the best day in the whole year to bathe in the Ganga in Rishikesh as it is the once a year festival of Shiva (Shiva Aarti) today!
Well, nothing is my chance and a couple of other people I know who I met along the way, Indians, were all very excited for me that I was doing this the first time on this “most auspicious day”.
So, with all this lovely reinforcement and loving company, I set off for the Ganga at about 12 in the afternoon…gathering my faith and courage for the adventure.
(Just a quick aside: this was the fourth massage I’ve done with Bablu and we’ve got a kind of rapport going, and today he asked me if I know that my bones (I am paraphrasing, his English is very poor and this took some time to understand) are weak, lacking calcium and dry…and I must go to a doctor to find out what to do. I asked how he knew this (which is true, I have advancing oesteoporsis) and he said he can feel it when he massages me. I told him I do expensive bone density scans with fancy machines back home and they say the same thing!! He gave me good nutritional advice, which I already know, but was surprised that he knew this much about counseling his clients, and he was very happy to hear that I do panchakarma, eat the right foods etc. )
So, I had a nice fruit salad for breakfast and headed off with my longee and a towel, and went to the area where several people had told me I’d find a quiet beach, and they were right. You can see from the pictures…those are my clothes drying on the rock, .JPG)
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and you can see the place where I immersed myself, several times. It was quiet, private and intensely powerful. 
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The waters were icey cold. Fed by the mountain snows which have begun to melt. At first I gasped and thought I could not do it, but ever so slowly I dipped in up to and over my waist, and then threw waters over the rest of my body, including my head…And quickly got out, but after resting in the sun for a few minutes, I felt the need to do it again and did. Despite the numbing cold, I felt warmth spreading through my entire body as the first of my fears began to desolve, being washed away in the waters of this holy river. Quite a remarkable experience. Sat on the beach for awhile and plan to try and go each morning now…before breakfast.
Had a pleasant lunch…enjoyed Shiva Aarti Day which I was told by many is THE most auspicious day to immerse in the Ganga in Rishikesh. There will also be special celebrations this evening at the puja, but my stomach is a little “dodgy” so may remain close to my room. Will decide later this evening. After my relaxing meal I head home, com[pletely energized and this is also the first time the sun has not bothered me, and I have headache. I’ve taken to wearing my dupatta (scarf) on my head like the Indian ladies (kaffiyah style_ and that seems to do the trick. So 2 fears have gone. I can be out all day in the sun, immerse myself in ice-water, with no ill effects, even find a quiet beach all by myself and the last fear, being out along after dark will be confronted and conquered either today or tomorrow.
Then, when I get home, I will begin traveling to “unknown” places alone by car!!!
The next post will be a lovely video I made of the area around laxman Jhula, with the sounds and sights of the place. You can even see the lovely scene of a lady feeding the holy cow and blessing her (or perhaps asking for a blessing for herself) by touching the cow’s head.
Many things are falling to into place, and I think the timing for my return home is just perfect.
I am truly loved and blessed…always watched over and taken care of…truly no reason for any sort of fear to limit me.
Namaste
Jane
Sunday, March 02, 2008
#10-March 2, 2008- I’ve been Cured
Sending some more pictures today…and just writing to say that if I ever continued to entertain the idea of bringing groups to India, the last two days have cured me of that for sure. I spent two days with 2 women from Russia, one of them who contacted me a couple of years ago via my blog and we have been trying to meet up in India since then, and her friend. Rich women who were here for a retreat and then came to spend 2 days in Rishikesh. Spending the two days with them, seeing what it means to show people around who want nothing more to do than shop, needing the patience to allow them to enjoy themselves while still moving them along to the various places to see and get a feel of Rishikesh…it was exhausting. And that was only 1 ½ days actually.
But I was out with them, took some nice pictures which I am posting here, and actually enjoyed much of the quiet time we spent together at meals etc. But the whole idea of doing this is really not for me. If any of you out there however ever decides to come to Rishikesh, and needs places to shop for good jewelry etc., I at least now have the information. These women spent over $3000 dollars on jewelry but I was introduced to places I would never have found on my own. For information purposes, it was a profitable day for me as well.
Hope you enjoy the pictures…I have had very little time on my own the past week since I met Ben….and then these women, as well as a lady I haven’t written about yet (she will be in the second “people” post as I am leaving her for the end…it will be difficult to really write about her)…but I did some computer fixing for her as well this week…and tomorrow the 2 ladies are leaving and Ben and I will be sharing healing sessions again and perhaps go to the puja in the evening. We’ve been spending lots of time together…he just keeps coming up looking for me until he finds me…and once he does, the time just goes by and it is dinner time and the day is once again over. He will begin his teachings shortly, so I guess I will have more time to myself by then, but for now I am enjoying his company, as he obviously is enjoying mine…lots of interesting discussions, lots of laughing…quite pleasant.
I still get my own walking in each day but it is beginning to get warmer and will probably have to change my schedule and go out for breakfast, instead of lunch and then spend the warm hours relaxing and then going out again in the evening…
OK…enough babbling….enjoy the pics. I'm trying to get more pics of people this trip and other interesting everyday scenes of life in Rishikesh. These were taken over a 3 hour period and the ones on the Ganga are evening time just before the puja...that is why the bridge is also so crowded...you can see evening baths in the Ganga, snacks to eat along the way and from earlier in the day, babas, kids coming home from school, etc.
Namaste
Jane
Friday, February 29, 2008
#10- Just a Few More Pics -Feb 28, 2008
Many lovely things are happening to me and my days are filled with joy and a feeling of wellbeing. But I don't seem to have the need to write, so just thought I would share a few more pics with you from my daily walk yesterday. The "mean" cow is my favorite of the day. It was actually a bull and stared at me from afar with a look in his eyes that I wanted to capture. But when I took out my camera and began focusing on him, he started coming towards me at a fairly quick pace with the same look in his eyes...so I snapped and left as quickly as possible. Can you see the look in his eyes as well?
The rest of the pics are just scenes of the day...gas delivery, people in the small ram jhula market, and the always present statues of gods and goddesses...
Enjoy
Namaste
Jane 
Wednesday, February 27, 2008
#9-Feb 27,2008 Boring Life if you have to just read about it....
I think the blog posts this trip are basically pretty boring for others to read, but I find my days so full and exciting, and have a wonderful sense of wellbeing I haven’t had in a long time. Part of this I know probably has to do with my recent attempt to wean myself from HRT (which I’ve been using for about 15 years and never been happy about…but have never had luck in the past getting off it). This time I decided to try using ayurveda herbal replacements in one last attempt to get these chemicals out of my body, but after trying for almost 3 months, and every day seemingly worse than the day before, and I won’t go into the gruesome details here, I finally decided to get back on my hormones. And within 2 days I was feeling like my old happy, contented self, and in just 5 days, all other symptoms have disappeared. Now you may ask what made me make the final decision to give up trying…well, like most everything else in my life, I ask for guidance and direction from my Guides and the answer always comes…if I listen! This time I received the answer in a dream where I saw myself with my old happy spirit back and wished I could go back to that “self”…and the next morning I was out walking, and stopped into one of the book shops to browse, and the first book that my hand landed on was “Ayurveda for Women”, by Robert Svoboda, one of the foremost ayurveda doctors in the world today. I starting skimming through it and the page that opened was HRT and ayurveda!!! I quickly read over his description of how, in many cases, herbal remedies can reduce most symptoms and help women lead a normal life…however, there are certain cases where HE does not recommend giving up HRT…he says there are certain women who really must have these hormones replaced artificially in order stay in good health. He does not recommend it for “keeping young” etc…only where true health issues are present…and the biggest health issue he feels should be helped with HRT is osteoporosis…in cases of osteoporosis, he ALWAYS recommends his patients use HRT as they are not simply trying to get rid of hot flashes or have younger looking skin etc. And this is MY issue… So I was given a definite “go ahead” to going back on hormones without feeling guilty, and know that this has added to my feelings of contentment and wellbeing which have been missing for some months now. The change is tangible. I am happy that I gave this a fair try, but am also happy that I am now back to the “real” me! I have begun writing a post about the people I have met on this trip, and it will be quite long when finished…I may post it in sections, but for now will write before posting it. Today I had a lovely walk as you can see from some of the photos and the very short video. The sound of silence is a rare commodity in India, and walking up this road following the Ganga up into the hills was a real thrill for me this morning.
The weather is getting hotter by the day, and soon I won’t be able to take these long walks I imagine, but for now, it is invigorating and I feel uplifted when I am out in nature like this. On the way back, I decided to really go all the way with lunch, and had a veggie burger on roll, salad and chips! Now I know this doesn’t sound like anything terrible, but the burger was made with potatoes, a definite no-no for me, I am not supposed to eat cold salad, and then of course the chips!!! But it was soooooooooooo delicious, and I Rekiied the food before eating it, as I usually do, but with extra added blessings for good health, did some Reiki after eating, and so far am feeling no side effects other than joy at having eaten it! And to end it off, I stopped off to buy something sweet and found a box of homemade choclates that a local mamaji makes, and bought a box. Haven’t tried them yet, but will this evening….Yesterday evening a nice guy I met did a shamanic healing on me and got rid of the last remnants of a slight dry cough which seemed to persist in the evening hours when the weather changed, and today he surprised me with a visit and asked for a Reiki Healing in exchange…which I happily did…helping him get rid of some deep seated pain, sadness and grief over a recent incident in his life. And then the evening proceeded to move along and we went together for dinner at Mamaji’s, came back to the room with our chai’s and ate chocolate which was DEEEEEEEEEEELICIOUS!. Yesterday, after lunch, I took a Rishshaw down into the market because I really needed sandals and couldn’t get what I wanted in my size up here where I did last year. The main road into town is closed for roadwork so the rickshaws (and every other type of vehicle) must use the back alleyways to get into the market in town…these alleys are barely wide enough for 2 rickshaws to pass each other, with gulleys along both sides of the road which an unwary driver could easily fall into….and now these alleyways are being used not only by rickshaws and motorbikes, but by huge 4x4 vehicles filled to overflowing with tourists…navigating a rickshaw past one of these was an amazing experience…even the Indians, who are nonchalant about this kind of stuff, applauded the driver when we got past not one, not two, but THREE of these vehicles without mishap and eventually got into town. I immediately found sandals, and then went exploring. Bought nail polish (have to do my toenails if I want to wear sandals…did a pedicure last night)…and then went down to the puja ghat and to my great joy found the public toilets. I always have a problem with needing a toilet and so every one I found is a real blessing. It means next time I go into town I don’t have to hurry home! Well, I’ll end this here and see about getting it posted today or tomorrow. Remember, if a post contains a video you must view it in the blog to be able to open the video…like the party one I sent several days ago.
Namaste Jane
Sunday, February 24, 2008
#8 Feb 24, 2008 -Message from an Angel
OK…so, what’s happening? Why am I not writing? Because I simply don’t feel like it. I see things during the day which draw my attention, but it is not in the form of needing to report or “tell about”, but more in the way of mindfulness…being….being with and in the moment completely. I don’t even have the need to take my camera out as I thought I would, and take some videos. It is a very liberating feeling, I have to tell you. But I have been walking every day, each day in a different direction, and have so far discovered a restaurant in whatever area I happen to be when lunch time comes around, which will serve me good healthy food, and so I allow myself to eat whatever I feel like for my evening meal. Tonight I am going to Mamaji for Thali for the first time since I’ve arrived. My appetite is back and I am really hungry during the day. I have a snack in the afternoon as well, but so far, at least according to what my jeans are telling me, I have not gained any weight so far…I am feeling really good. Today I was out too long in the sun and fearing no toilet, did not drink enough, so have a slight headache, but nothing terrible. I also found, so far, 2 very clean public toilets during my walks which is good to know about.
I DID “redo” my room today and it is still small but feels a lot more homelike and I am happier now coming back into its energies…this also gives me a good feeling.
I am beginning to write some posts for my Mindfulness Journal which I hope will be ready over the next few days, but again, nothing because I “have to”…only because I
“feel like”. It is quite pleasant for me. We generally have so many things we “must” do that we don’t get around to the important things…to just “being”.
So, why am I writing at all today? To tell you about the first message I received…and it was so subtle, that I did not realize it was a message until a day later, and have not had the time to write about it since then.
While I was still not feeling entirely myself, and still a little despondent, and also feeling guilty about not “doing” anything with the short time I have here, I asked for clarity, direction, guidance before going to sleep one night, as I often do when I need insights and understanding.
Next day, I found a lovely e-mail from a wonderful friend I met last year in India, as response to my post #4. And after reading it once, and then once again, I realized that this lovely man was the angel sent to deliver the message this time. So I will copy most of the e-mail he sent, and just tell you that what he wrote was exactly what I needed to hear and was obviously a direct reply to my request the evening before at bedtime:
Thanks for the latest update. Pleased to have your news.
I totally empathize with your sense of a need to scale back a bit on
your "output" generally. I've been through the same introspective
analysis too. I regularly feel the need to interface with the greater
world and also my closer friends in a more interactive and
comprehensive way. Personally, though, I also know that I need more
time to ponder where I'm at and where to focus my energy next. I've
neglected some of my self-development - I need to spend a lot more
time just in contemplation and meditation - the problem for me is
getting focussed. . . . but it is difficult for people like ourselves to disengage or trim back our wider involvement in things. It is not a "cop out" or "reduced energy with age thing" but a maturity "thing" (for want of a better word ). I feel I need to evolve a bit to my own next level and that my "busy-ness" is just an excuse to put off my own inner development. I'm working on it anyway.
. . . You get lots of R&R and let the rest of the world stumble along a
bit. YOU are valuable too and deserve some downtime.
Hugs,
I am leaving it anonymous, but will just say that this person was just as surprised to find out he was an angel as I was. I LOVE the way things work!!!
Namaste
Jane
Friday, February 22, 2008
#7 - Feb 22, 2008- The Israeli Riddle and the Urge to Write
I’m sitting here for the first time since I arrived with the urge, or need, to narrate. I will do my best to give words to the day, in which nothing exciting happened and yet I am excited all the same.
Woke up this morning to a hazy sky, but the truth is, this weather might not be great for photographing, but it is perfect for walking, and this what I find myself doing now…walking….
Had my regular breakfast, took a nice hot shower, had my room cleaned and then headed out with a couple of “errands” in mind and then just the thought of meandering around. I found a little hole-in-the-wall chemist shop no bigger than my bathroom,
and I have placed an order with him for all the meds I usually buy up in Dharamsala. I thought I would have to go search in the market for a “real” chemist shop, but this guy was so excited to get my order…and says he can get everything for me by Sunday. I probably will be spending more in one day than he makes in a week, or perhaps more – but for me and my family it is a big savings and certainly easy enough to do while in India.
Then I continued walking down towards Laxman Jhula and passed by the Divine Resort where Vivek has his new center. Went in to check it out. The hotel is quite impressive and the rooms really nice, and if anyone would ever want a “real” hotel, rather than Swiss Cottage, in a good location, I would recommend it. The center Vivek is so proud of is nothing to speak of, but certainly not any worse than all the other places here.
And then down to Lakman Jhula, a stop off in a book shop to browse, cross over the bridge and thought to try out a new restaurant I had seen yesterday advertising ahurveda kitcheri which is the best thing for my recuperation. I went upstairs in the Jaipur Inn to discover a lovely and pleasant roof top restaurant, beautifully clean, lovely toilet, overlooking the bridge and the Ganga. And to my surprise, I was served absolutely delicious Chai (I overdosed on caffeine today, having a cup of real south Indian filter coffee later on in the day!) and a lovely serving of kitcheri and curd. Quite delicious and just the thing. And that is where I was sitting when the urge to write over took me. But I did not sit down to write then and there, and decided to just get my mindfulness going and write later when I came back to my room, which is what I am doing now.
While sitting quietly on the roof, enjoying the atmosphere, all of a sudden noise, and I mean NOISE…not the standard street noise, was heard coming from the bridge area. I went to look, along with the Indians up on the roof…it was a political demonstration…apparently this is election season in Utrerakand…first a guy was shooing everyone off the bridge and not allowing any new people to enter the bridge from either side. And then, the motorcycles began, each with 2 or 3 riders carrying flags, beeping their horns, and singing some campaign slogan apparently. And this went on, and on, and on…all the time people patiently waiting to cross the bridge from either side…tourists trying to get ON the bridge and being pushed back….and it went on, and on, and on….once over the bridge, starting to move up the main street, until there was nothing but a stream of motorcycles from one side of the bridge to the other and moving up towards Ram Jhula…and from across the bridge there seemed no end to the procession in site. It took a good 20 minutes for all these cycles to cross over and regular traffic to resume on the bridge, but the noise from below continued for another long while.
I had finished eating by this time, and decided to just sit and relax for awhile, when an American couple came up and we began talking. Seems they are staying at the Swiss as well after just arriving in Rishikesh. We had a really interesting conversation for about 45 minutes when we decided to part company until later in the evening back at Swiss Cottage.
I came to an interesting insight around that time. Seems last year, I never really discovered rishikesh. Frist I did my panchakarma, then I recuperated, then began meeting people and spending lots of time with others, and then I began working etc., etc., so that I had very very little time alone. Now, being completely alone, feeling good, and with perfect weather, I am exploring and checking out new places and finding a whole new side to the adventure of Rishikesh. It is almost like being here for the first time, only better, because I am comfortable with the place. Following the restaurant, I again walked up to Ram Jhula along the Ganga, when all of a sudden someone comes up to me and says “Jane, is that really you?” It was the guy Bernard I met last year who I went hiking with a couple of times and then seemed to disappear into thin air. He wrote once but that was it. His girlfriend back in Germany had dumped him meaning when he left India he had no home to go back to. I was quite surprised to see him and even more surprised that he remembered me, and my name. Seems he has now been in Rishikesh for 7 weeks, but since he left India last year, he has been moving around. He spent the summer hiking in the Italian Alps, and then spent months in Nepal, mostly around Pokara, and as mentioned, arrived back here to stay at a fancy ashram about 2 months ago. Says he will come visit me at Swiss, but I doubt I’ll see him again. Continued my walk and decided to try out a health food restaurant I noticed yesterday tucked in behind the taxi stand in Ram Jhula…and had a lovely snack of really really good home made apple pie made with whole wheat flour crust and, as mentioned, a cup of coffee. Had an interesting discussion with the owner (I will definitely be going back there to eat, they have a fantastic menu with brown organic rice, veggies, steamed etc., whole wheat pasta lots of stuff. And it is a little closer than Welcome Center and also has a nice sitting area up on the roof.)
And this brings us to the question of the relative absence of Israelis in India. Since I arrived here, even at the airport, then in the taxi, then here at Swiss and other places I’ve visited, the big topic of conversation is what has happened to the Israeli tourist trade here. It seems to have dwindled to a trickle, in relative terms. The theory (and I say theory as I have no way of knowing if it is true or not, although every Indian I speak to tells the exact same story…so somewhere along the line there must either be truth in it or very good propaganda by the INDIAN government to explain the loss of income from the lack of Isrealies). So, the theory is, that the ISRAELI government has asked the INDIAN government to not give so many visas to Israelis, and then to only give 3 month visas, because they need the Israelis in the country to fight and also don’t want the young Israelis here using drugs and coming up all screwed up! I don’t know if this is true, but every person I speak to is complaining of a BIG loss of business without the Israelis…clothing shops, restaurants, internet places…everywhere. There definitely is a conspicuous void of Israelis in the restaurants, shops, guesthouses and roaming the streets. It could be they are simply else where, but the stories from the Indians seem to say they are simply not here at all. The other tourists I’ve spoken too even mentioned that they were told they would be inundated with Israelis wherever they went in India, and so far they have seen very few…so there does seem to be some truth to the whole thing.
I finally came back to my room, walking up this time instead of taking a rickshaw, and feeling energies I haven’t felt in a long time. Oh, almost forgot…can’t get away from it. I bought some stuff. I don’t need anything, but I saw a couple of really different kinds of blouses and a new style pants I wanted to try, and couldn’t resist. Hope I will get use out of them when I get home.
So I am now back in my room. Actually out on the roof, using my laptop, which is actually on my LAP at the moment…waiting for a phone call from my Mother as usual on Friday…feeling energized, invigorated, and so very content. And now the thought of being here for only another month is quite difficult, but I will make the most of each day and know it will be good to get home as well. I will have work waiting for me…I will try to arrange workshops while here so that I can get right back to work..and I know that this short special time here will seem like a dream in a very short time.
Namaste
Jane
Thursday, February 21, 2008
#6..Feb 21, 2008 - assuming the #5 with the video uploaded earlier….
Well, things are starting to fall into a pattern, and I see now why I can never stay less than 3 weeks in any place if I’m really to get a feel for it. For the last 3 days I’ve been out walking, and yesterday I took the scenic road down all the way to Welcome Center where they have really good, homemade, made as you order it, Ayurveda cooking. As good as what I cook and enjoy at home. And I was not disappointed. So, decided to go there every day for lunch, which means I get two wholesome meals in a day as breakfast is my regular soaked overnight dried fruits and almonds mixed with porridge. That leaves me the fun of doing what I want in the evening and the rest of the day without feeling too guilty, and still being able to feel like I’m on vacation.
Today I decided, the weather being lovely, to take the full walk around. All in all it is about 4 km. I imagine but not quite sure as it is just so pleasant you don’t feel the distance. I walked down to Laxman Jula, crossed over the bridge and then headed up to Ram Jula, which I know is 2.5 km along the Ganga. The walk was beautiful and I felt alive and invigorated with a sense of wellbeing I haven’t felt in a long time. I felt so blessed I found tears welling up in my eyes. (By the way, I am now sitting outdoors, at 6 PM, listening to classical music, enjoying the air on the roof here, and of course enjoying my laptop).
Just before Ram Jula, I came to vivek’s center, the place I did my panchakarma last year, and he was there, so we sat and chatted for about an hour, I noted some definite improvements in the center. I mentioned that the Ganga seemed very low this year and he explained that is because there has been a late winter, and the snows haven't begun melting yet. Once they do, the river will fill up as I remember it. And then continued on my way, back across the Ganga via Ram Jula and again over to Welcome Center, where I had another lovely lunch.
Came back, played around with the video I took last night of the party, which I hope I’ll be able to upload to my blog without too much trouble. You are invited to listen to it just to hear the music…there is not much to see…
And then Amir, the guy in charge here, came to say hello and we had an interesting, and pleasant talk for another while…he was quite excited seeing the videos I took and asked if he could use my camera to take pictures of his work here to send back to his family in Nepal…of course I agreed…I will burn them to a CD for him afterwards. He also looked at pictures of my family and his face was alive with pleasure…he is young, about 25 I think, but you can see he misses his family. He was completely taken in by the kids, with comments about all of them, and even did a fairly good job of figuring out who the brothers and sisters were…and then he saw the pic of my girls, and Mom, and he couldn’t stop commenting. But the biggest reactions were for the men in the family…all struck his fancy…and he said Yaniv looks much much younger, and of course handsomer, without his rastot. But the final comment was for Shai…he took one look at him, asked who he was, and said “He is dangerous” He should be in the movies…the girls better watch out”. I told him he has a girlfriend and he said that SHE better keep him under lock and key…he is too gorgeous.
The evening calls of the birds has just begun…it sounds like they are arguing over who gets to sleep where tonight…what a racket!!
Anyway, I am now just writing this up to let you know that my days have found their even keel, with my morning time well spent and worthwhile, and the rest of my day spent just being. I often think that it seems strange to have to come all the way to India to do this, but I just can’t seem to manage it at home. And it is something I feel I need to get back into myself and move forward. Exactly where this trip will take me, I still don’t know, but I am finally beginning to enjoy each step of the journey once again.
Just a quick observation. Considering how sick I was just last week, and howquickly and easily I recovered, I know that the relative healthy state of my body following my recent panchakarma, the combination of antibiotics for a quick jump-start for 3 days and the ayurvedic meds I wastaking, and most important, the 2 hours of daily Reiki I did tomyslef...alll worked together in beautiful harmony. Which is as it should be. Reiki is wonderful on its own but is a perfect compliment to all other forms of medical treatment as well.
Love to all
Jane
Monday, February 18, 2008
#4 - Feb.18, 2008 No Muse
Hi All
I’m sending this off not because there is anything really interesting to write, or because I have a deep need to write…well, perhaps that IS interesting. I actually have no desire to put anything down “on paper” and for me that is a big change. I’ve felt like this for the past couple of months, even at home, but figured once I got to new places, the muse would find me again, but so far, nothing.
So just to keep you up to date and let you know that all is well, I will zip this off. I went out and about today…
the weather was hazy which was perfect for a longer walk, and there was even some drizzle on the way back. I did not even take the camera as I knew the clarity would not be good enough for any video to come out. But I went all the way down to Laxsman Jula, had a lovely lunch at the German bakery, bought a couple of books and slowly made my way back up, expecting to find it difficult, but am now easily and happily back in my room…which is dreary without the lovely sunshine. I made an appointment for a massage tomorrow, the first of many I hope, have decided not to go to Mussoorie for several reasons, and for now, just hang around and relax. I need further perspectives re: the coming 6 weeks, what I am meant to achieve here, where this trip is meant to take me, and I need to be at peace with each day to gain any clarity. Hopefully, the coming days will shed some new light on the rest of the trip here. I feel at loose ends so am not looking much past the moment…which is as it should be…am doing my best to be mindful, have met some interesting people here – different from the type of tourists I’ve met in the past in India, and it is refreshing to say the least. The town is pretty much empty, of Westerners and Indians both…the Ganga is much lower than I remember it last year. And that’s about it!
And just for those of you who were following my saga BEFORE I left, exactly 2 weeks after it was stolen, my handbag was found yesterday. I received an e-mail from someone living near my house, saying she found it thrown in among some bushes. What shape it is in I do not know, and if anything is missing, I also don’t know, but my daughter will be retrieving it for me today. So, what’s the lesson? Obviously, don’t worry. Take things as they come…don’t draw conclusions from things which seem obvious to you, but probably have much deeper meaning lurking around. I cannot for the life of me figure out why it went missing in the first place, and now why it has turned up, but I am really happy as I really like not only the handbag, but the small change purses inside as well which I have had for some years now after buying them in McLeodganj. I was considering going all the way up there just to replace them!
OK…don’t know when I will be back here again. Don’t worry about me. I am pleased that I don’t even feel like being at the computer, even though it is right in the room with me. I will do my best to answer your individual mails, but it may take longer than usual as well.
My love to all
Namaste
Jane
Tuesday, August 28, 2007
SOUNDS OF INDIA - FOREST WALK
Just to prove that India is not all noise and bussle, here is a short video of one of my walks on the mountain above Dharamkot in Dharamsala (Mcleodganj)
HORSEBACK RIDING VIDEO
And last but not least, a very short look into the day I went horseback riding with William at the end of my trip. It is very short as I forgot to empty my memory card before going out and simply had no room left for more shots. But enjoy anyway!
Friday, June 08, 2007
India Journal 2006-#71-June 5-8, 2007 Getting Close to the Wire
Just going over the past few days with some interesting meetings and comments and thoughts. I am getting close to the wire so to speak, and trying to make the most of every moment despite the fact that conditions are not ideal.
The weather has finally gotten hot here as well and will remain so for another couple of weeks until Monsoon begins toward the end of June. Yesterday for example, at 5 in the afternoon when it had already started cooling down a little bit, it was 30 degrees in the shade...it was well up into the 30's during the day, morning hours being the hottest...I am using my fan all the time now, even at night, and last night I slept without my blanket for the first time...just top sheet and little bed cover...it doesn't even get really cool even at night now, although it is pleasant enough once the sun goes down around 8 PM. If I am in the shade, it is OK, but the weather has pretty much confined me to town, as I cannot go walking any longer. Even if I take a Rickshaw up the mountain, it is still too hot to walk around up there, as much of the walking is in the sun. I go for a walk for about an hour, just up and down around town in the evening, and of course still walk back and forth during the day, but spend lots of time relaxing in my room or on the balcony in the shade.
So, what has happened over the past few days...
Well, William left 2 days ago, and I am once more left on my own. But, as I will write soon, never really alone it seems, at least not for any significant length of time.
I sent out my final package, weighing about 6 KG. And, although it is fairly simple here, just take the package to be parceled right next door to my hotel and one door away from the Post Office, and then into the post office and off it goes. Problem was, one of the 500 rupee notes I had (and the very end of my money that day), had a small corner torn, and so the Post Office refused to take it. so I went off to change it at the Bank, but when I got there, there was a very very long line. Remember, each person is depositing or withdrawing money in general, or paying a bill, and they do not have the automatic counting machines like banks at home have. and in Rupees there are MANY notes to count. So first the clerk has to count sometimes thousands of notes, and then recount them, then give them to the person who also counts them to be sure, meaning each person in line is there at least 15 minutes, many longer. There were 10 people on line in front of me. So I asked one of the other clerks if they could just change the note for me, but was told I had to wait on line!! And that's when I decided to beat the system. Walked back to the POst office and told the lady there that the bank said the note was good and did not need to be exchanged. I was very quiet, but did not back down, and after much discussion among the Postal employees, I found myself with the proper change in hand and a receipt for the package. I was so proud of myself.
I have apparently lost weight this trip and as I have been as careful as I can manage to eat properly, and stay away from cakes and sweets (generally speaking...), the weight has stayed off...I guess I am thinner than when I left home but I really feel good, and when I truly have the need, I eat something sweet, cake, or chocolate etc. But certainly not on a regular basis. I also seem to get along on much less food, particularly not having the need to eat anything, usually, between meals.
Just as William left and I thought I would settle down to a couple of quiet, alone days, Shanti (the healer who did the aura transformation for me, met me and asked for a few Reiki/healing sessions. I began them a couple of days ago and so far we have done 2, with 2 more scheduled. They have been very powerful for both of us. I find myself more and more tuned into events and feelings in other people's lives, intuitively, with much guidance...but I am no longer doubtful of what I sense, and the things I understand and then discuss with my clients, are always intense and important for them. Every time I move deeper into these places, I have more and more faith in the guidance I am given, and in myself as a healer. It is a true blessing to be in this new place. When I finished with her that day, I thought to go for a lite dinner and early to bed.
Just as I finished eating at Nick's, Vanessa, a friend from Rishikesh walked in and sat down with me, and shortly after, Akhilesh walked in as well. He and Vanessa also know each other as she took a meditation course with him. And we sat and talked for 3 hours. It was 10 by the time I headed home and on the way a an urge for chocolate. I bought a small bar with fruit and nuts and headed to my room. Ate the chocolate and read for awhile and was sure the late hour together with the chocolate would preclude easy sleeping, but I slept like a log until morning!!
Things seem to just keep flowing beautifully for me. The next day I met Yanna, the lady I met at the beginning with broken wrist, and we spent some pleasant time together as well. It seems that each day has some kind of social "event" occurring without any pre-planning. Yesterday I went to get one more thing from Ashok, the chemist, and met his girlfriend there and we sat and spoke for quite awhile as well. That's where I saw the temperature...he has a thermometer on his balcony.
Last night, decided to pick a Tarot card for some quick insight into my homecoming and what to expect or to do, direction for the next few months, etc.. Well, the card
I picked was PATIENCE...which says, in short......"simply be alert, patient, waiting...contented in waiting...be passive...let nature take its course like phases of the moon...not sleepy or indifferent...be ready for something momentous...a time full of mystery like the hours just before dawn...it is time when the only thing to do is wait!".
Couldn't have found something more perfect to take home with me!!
And that's about it. Today was even hotter yet. It is only 10 AM and it must be 35 degrees already....I will make it through the next few days with this enforced resting...and hopefully come home to cooler weather...although from what I hear, it is no different at home!
Monday, June 04, 2007
India Journal 2006 -#69- June 4, 2007- Horseback Riding
Well, today I went horseback riding with William. We first went up the mountain where I usually walk, and then continued to trails which I've partially walked in the past but never to the end. It was quite lovely. At the beginning I was very tense, felt like I would fall off the horse, was holding on really tight and not enjoying, but after the first 1/2 hour I relaxed into the swing and really began to enjoy the vista from up on the horse. I didn't take too many pics as I couldn't do it while riding...but we stopped a couple of times, and I also took a video while riding which you'll have to wait to see. coming DOWN hill was not comfortable and when we got closer to Dharamkot, we both got off and walked the rest of the way and that was fine. William is an accomplished rider, but everyone was very patient with me and I had a lovely lovely day...a real adventure.
Yesterday was a REAL storm again, but it cleared the air and the weather could not have been more perfect for this day out...I am truly blessed, again, and as always!
Enjoy the pics and imagine how much fun I was having.!!
Namaste
Jane
Half Way Point...I've very often walked up to this point but not by going all the way around the mountain as we did today.
First Rest Stop Overlooking Dal Lake and Naddi etc....been up
here by foot before a few years ago with Anil..
William
Both of Us
William at the Half way Point
From Here you can begin the walk down to the waterfalls
or up to Triund...we just rested and then came back down!!
Horsies
Overlooking Dal Lake, Army Cantonement, TCV and further to
the right, Naddi
Naddi..note the HUGE tower on the left...new...good phone
reception but not very pretty
Naddi
Guide and his son (who got to ride my horse most of the way
down and was quite happy!)
Dal Lake
