Friday, March 14, 2008

# 17 March 13-14 – Lazy, Lazy, Lazy….and Rain

Started last nite…was very hot yesterday and was really tired after my walking so just hung around the rest of the afternoon and evening. Had some grilled cheese up in my room for a snack at nite. I was up the roof playing “bubbles” and listening to my lovely flute music when Ben came up and asked what I was doing. I said “Some real deep spiritual work”. He came to see what it was and burst out laughing when he saw what I was playing. I explained it really was a form of inner work for me as it was one of the few ways I could find myself completely “mindless”!. And then like a little boy he asked if he could please please please try to play too, but I warned him that it could be dangerous to begin this game.
“You can’t just ‘try’ this game and he replied: “I’m fine…I don’t get addicted to this kind of stuff”.

Well, I could not get him to relinquish the mouse for 1 ½ hours until I finally asked to be allowed to go to sleep. He said OK but please please please could he come up again to play in the morning.
I thought he was joking, but bright and early he was up here and spent another 1 ½ hours in this completely mindless but actually relaxing pursuit. I, in the meantime, realized I didn’t feel like doing anything today. Perhaps the weather-it is actually overcast, windy and chilly…so I sat in my room while he played and cursed, and I did some work I needed to for myself. Finally kicked him out and now am alone and still with no desire to do anything. I am listening to music, will play some games as well, hang around with people at lunch…all here “at home”.

This evening I am hopefully going to do a past-life regression with a guy named Dudi to see if we can find the source of my irrational fears and finish the cleansing process once and for all.

So it will be a quiet, reflective, lovely day doing “nothing” and feeling wonderful about it.

8 PM
It is now almost 8 in the evening. Had the need to sleep this afternoon, (only in retrospect did I realize the entire lack of energy the whole day was due to my anxiety of what I might find out during the healing session….) and when I woke up I did the healing and past-life regression with Dudi and it was wonderful Received more answers and insights into the fear thing and am completely energized as well. And when I came out, it was raining and no electricity! (That would explain the slight twinge in my hip yesterday and this morning). So, got a couple of candles from downstairs and am now up in room, by candlelight, incense burning, eating crackers and cheese and listening to folkdancing and for the first time this trip even have the urge to dance!. Am feeling really good and if the electricity comes back on, I have a “date” to watch the movie Himalaya with Ben this evening and if not, will dance in the dark alone!!. (Or so I imagined!!). And then the strangest thing happened. I have about 600 songs in my folkdancing playlist, and I put them on to play at random, and the first song that came up was a further answer to what went on during the healing session with Dudi. A song with words which said exactly what I still needed to hear was playing, as if the angels , or my guides were singing the answer to me disguised as the voice of Daklon (Israeli singer) singing “Al Nevakesh”. All the verses are insightful, but just as an example, here is a translation of theverse:
“There are unknown secret things which we cannot understand or know
Things may happen which seem without reason
Not all things need to be investigated and questioned
Sometimes it is alright not to know everything”

I imagine the air will also be less heavy tomorrow and I will feel like walking again (And that was exactly what happened, as I woke up the next morning to the clearest bluest sky I have seen since arriving and a lovely feeling of clean and fresh in the air).

And then Ben arrived….no lites…caught me dancing…but just asked to sit down and play again, which he did until the battery ran out on the computer. Then we just sat and talked until my sweet neighbors came up. Finding their room dark and uninviting, I asked them to come in and join us. By then it was raining hard and quite dreary…they came into my candle-lit room, and said “Why does it feel so warm and comfortable in here? Our room is the same but it is nothing like your room” It’s like when people come into my living room at home and say the same thing…good energies…My room is very inviting. We sat and enjoyed each others company, all the time with my folkdancing music still playing and everyone commenting that it was quite pleasant to listen to. Close to 10 the lites finally came on so the girls left and Ben and I still had our movie date! We even sat and held hands like in the real movies. Only thing missing was popcorn. In all, it was a lovely day!

And now it is morning. Brilliant blue sky…lovely sunshine, nice breeze and clean fresh air…like after a chamsin at home when the rains finally come. Beautiful, beautiful day.

I went down to the market with a few friends and actually found fabric I liked and which is now at the tailor to make a couple of more things for me from things I already have and like from home.